This Week
- The final days abroad in Greece.
- Coming back to my van, did it start up? Were there any issues?
- Some raw thoughts about this next chapter of my life.
November 2025
| Su | M | T | W | Th | F | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 11/1 |
| 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |
| 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 |
| 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 |
| 30 | 12/1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
Where In The World Was I?
- 🇬🇷 Crete, Greece
- 🇬🇷 Athens, Greece
- ✈️ Frankfurt (FRA)
- ✈️ Houston (IAH)
- 🚐 Albuquerque, New Mexico, U.S.
- 🚐 Deerfield, Kansas, U.S.
- 🚐 Denver, Colorado, U.S.
Live travel map link:
Metrics From The Week
1.5x pace of aging is worse than a couple months ago going out partying 😂 😅 I think part of this is the timezone changes that Whoop doesn’t take into account. Regardless, gonna get this back in order again 😅
Final Morning In Crete
Packed up, drove back to Heraklion with the guys, and flew back to Athens.
Last Day In Athens
Had a day and a half before flying out.
Made two Reels from the catamaran boat trip. Sick footage from the drone, I had fun putting that together.
And went for a run, with a couple hill sprints.
Like A Movie
I’m taking the metro in from the airport into Athens with my bags (on arrival). It’s about an hour trip, so I had some time to kill.
We get closer into the city and it gets a bit more congested with people.
This beautiful girl gets on and stands in front of me holding onto the handrail.
I notice her leopard print pants, then get the idea to say something. My brain goes through some overthinking, but then she turns in my direction, so I go for it and tap her on her shoulder, ask if she speaks English, then compliment her pants. She smiles and goes “oh, thank you!” and turns back around.
I didn’t say anything else, didn’t feel the need to, and put my headphones back on.
But over the next I dunno 5-10 minutes, I see her kind of fidgety, looking around a bit, like she’s a little anxious or something (unrelated to my compliment). I catch her looking at me and my bags here and there, like she’s trying to put the pieces together.
I smile again.
Eventually she gets off at the stop before mine and BRO IT WAS LIKE A MOVIE…
She walks out of the metro. Time slows down. I see her turn around as she’s walking away…
Through the sea of passing heads, she looks back at me and our eyes connect.
She smiles. Then turns away.
The metro doors close.
Ahahahahah I swear. I was like bro what just happened 😂
Sure, I didn’t close, thought about it, but I’ll take the dub anyways.
✈️ Back To The U.S.
Flew from Athens, to Frankfurt, to Houston, to Albuquerque. 27 total hours of travel.
The Frankfurt to Houston was kinda brutal… It wasn’t exactly overnight because you’re following the sun, so I didn’t really want or try to sleep besides dozing off here and there. ~11 hours. The others were fine.
Was I grateful for the in-flight meal? Yes.
Was it objectively the worst in-flight meal I’ve had over the last year of flights? … Also yes 😂 Com’on U.S./United get it together 😂
Back to the U.S.! 11 months abroad… Wow. It’s still crazy to me.
I got in at 10pm to Albuquerque and booked a hotel so I could have the full day to fix anything and everything wrong with my van.
Side note: $80 for one night! $80! Holy hatpin Charles! This is crazy. And the hotel was kinda sketchy too haha.
Back After 11 Months…
I left the van on December 23rd, 2024 (The Holiday Week In Miami With Family, December 30th, 2024).
For the last few months that I had the idea of coming back to the U.S. and my van, there was a lot of uncertainty and unknowns.
Would it even start?
Would there be rodents nesting or chewed wires?
Would the tires be flat?
Would it even still be there?
A small reminder that this is my home this isn’t just another vehicle.
There was this singular moment, a fork in my life that would determine how I would spend the next days/weeks/months.
That moment? Putting the key inside and then, turning it…
Maybe it starts up just fine.
Maybe the battery is dead and I just need to jump it.
Maybe it doesn’t start at all, there’s some deeper or more expensive problem…
I was already starting to go through the ideas… I could rent a hotel, I could rent a car and sleep in it, I could fly to my family’s, I could just fly back to Europe for a month…
So many things resting on this moment.
No freakin’ way…
No flat spots in the tires, no nests. Put the water pipes and electrical back together and drove off in awe.
I had some leaks in one of the water pipe connections that took me a bit to fix but eventually got that fixed up.
Otherwise? It’s basically as good as I left it.
This life is fucking crazy bro what the hell. We’re back in the van after 11 months sitting there…
Can’t find the note but at some point I had dreamed of this life, traveling abroad, having my van out west, coming back for 3-4mo, then flying abroad again…
THIS LIFE IS FUCKING CRAZY
(Side note, it’s Sunday, 4 days after, and I’m still as dumbfounded)
Albuquerque
I spent a day in Albuquerque just getting things back together, working in a coffee shop, organizing all my shit in the van, getting groceries, etc.
The Farm
Then drove up to see my cousin on his farm to say hi before heading to the next destination.
Back To Colorado
Drove back up to Denver!
Back to showering in Anytime Fitness, eating dinner in a Sprouts parking lot, and stealth camping on residential streets, lol.
This content is not ready to be made public yet.
Thoughts From The Week
Started recording these audio notes while driving again, I call them podcasts. Did this a number of times in the van in the past couple years.
I’ll share some of them here.
202511130734 Podcast Sn 4 Ep 1 - Back to van life
#podcast #raw
# Podcast Sn 4 Ep 1 — Back to Van Life
Good morning.
We are driving into—I think it’s called Little Bear—coffee shop in Albuquerque, New Mexico. It is my first full day back in the van. I’ve been abroad for 11 months, and, uh, it’s pretty wild.
This life is fucking crazy. I’m very grateful that my van runs and everything works. Honestly, the only thing that’s not working is my water filter—the connection broke, so I just need to get that fixed. My pipes were leaking yesterday, but I fixed that with the water. The van runs, got the oil changed—everything is solid.
Which is crazy. The tires seem good.
Anyway, enough rambling. I woke up last night at 2:30 and was just thinking about this desire to lock in this next chapter—to really get intentional—and how I can bring all of the learnings and the energy behind living in Bali and van life.
I’m trying to think of what I want this next chapter to look like, because soon enough it’ll be Christmas. I need to either drive out there or buy a flight to Virginia. Pretty soon it’ll fly through January, then February, and it’ll be March.
I have a feeling [name] is gonna do a Bali March event, and I have a feeling it’s gonna feel a little too soon.
My point being: this chapter is going to fly by.
But I don’t want to just be the same version of myself that I was 11 months ago.
---
## What Version of Myself Do I Want to Be?
I was thinking: what version of myself—what habits—do I want to do while I’m here in the van?
I don’t want to get complacent. I don’t want to be watching YouTube all day. I want to be intentional.
I’m trying to balance this line between enjoying my life in the present—which looks like skiing and traveling—with also this pull into a bigger vision, a bigger purpose.
I truly believe this is going to be big—whatever “this” is. This business, this brand, this life.
I was saying, I can’t remember where—Athens maybe—after I complimented that girl, I thought: _statistically my life does not exist._
There’s virtually no one living like this. We are statistically insignificant—the number of people who live my life.
And I don’t want to squander that. I don’t want to take it for granted.
---
## The Trap of “Only Doing What I Want”
I’ve lived the last couple of years doing only things that I want to do. I have a note in my Obsidian that literally says: _doing the only things that I want to do._
That’s kind of been the summary of my last couple of years.
But I worry that the downside risk of only doing what I want to do is… only doing what I want to do in the short term.
If you extrapolate that, you get short-term versus long-term gratification.
And I worry that I’ll wake up in 20 years and go, “Ah shit, I still haven’t built this business,” because I’ve only done things that I _wanted_ to do rather than intentionally _build._
So my point is: I want to actually build and grow while living this lifestyle that I enjoy.
The question is: what does that actually look like?
---
## Habits and Behavior Change
I come back to habits and behavior change all the time.
I could go through my identity embodiment roadmap doc that I made. The first part is defining your self-image and identity. I’m not quite sure what that looks like right now, but what I was thinking about last night at 2:30 was: what habits do I want to do that will move me forward?
So let’s riff on that—what are the good habits and what are the bad habits?
In this chapter, I want to be really intentional about not letting bad habits slip and not letting good habits slip.
---
### Good Habits
- **Meditation** — for sure, daily.
- **Journaling.**
- **Working out.**
I think part of my routine needs to change. I could keep going to coffee shops because that gets me moving in the morning, gets me into action and momentum. But I don’t think the answer is four hours of laptop time every morning.
What if I did, say, 7:30 to 9:30—two hours—and then went back to the van? By that time, parks are open, I can go to other places, meditate, record videos, read.
Reading is another habit. There are so many books I want to download the knowledge from.
This comes down to identity and habits—am I actually reading? Am I allocating time in my day toward reading? And am I applying what I’m reading?
---
### Business Habits
Recording content. Making videos. Journaling every day.
Hamza talks about self-improvement—he’s in a new chapter of journaling and meditating daily. I want to do that too.
---
### Life Evaluation & Social Skills
Another idea: go through categories or topics of life and rank myself. Get intentional about improving.
Social skills are another big one. I had this idea in Bali—one or two days a week, go to a mall or park for the sole reason of starting exchanges with people. Compliment three people. That’s it.
And if I don’t, don’t just say “it’s fine.” Treat it as a system—figure out what didn’t work and fix it.
---
[...]
---
## Balancing Comfort and Growth
Last night I was debating: do I take this meeting tomorrow morning? There wasn’t a massive drive to do it. There was friction—finding a place, setting up—and I don’t want that to become a pattern of “only doing things I want to do.”
Yes, I can build my business around what I enjoy, but there are little discomforts that only remain discomforts until you face them—then they become part of your comfort zone.
---
## Closing Thoughts
Anyway, we’re here at Little Bear Coffee.
Gonna do a little bit of admin, a little journaling, write down some of these ideas, and figure out where to go next.
Probably only do an hour and a half, then unpack the van and get the rest of the van admin stuff done.
So anyway, that’s it.
Thanks for listening.
See you next time!
202511141602 Podcast Sn 4 Ep 3 - Inspiration from Hamza Unfiltered videos, YouTube, motivation, lock in metrics, lifestyle is part of business
#podcast #raw
What is up?
I'm gonna record a little podcast here. I've been watching a bunch of old Hamza Unfiltered videos from three years ago. I've been kind of going through his top five popular videos, flashbacks to three years ago in the van.
And I've been getting some inspiration about my own YouTube journey and business journey here. Just not making it complicated—you know, the types of videos he makes or was making are super simple. I think why they work so well is he's a very good communicator and storyteller.
I notice he polarizes people very easily, and he just talks very fluidly. I had some motivations and inspirations when he was talking about his routine and daily intentionality.
Just this idea of what he was saying: lock yourself in a room and just work—meditate, deep work, read, kickboxing, weight training. And I feel like one of the things holding me back is my desire for novelty—going to a coffee shop, driving around, finding a park—and not having the discipline to do the things that will move me forward.
[...]
If I think back, my lifestyle has probably been getting in the way. I’m not the “lock myself in a room, make money online” guy—and that’s also not the type of person I’m trying to attract.
Basically, I want to help a high-income earner or high achiever who feels like the path they’re on is no longer for them and needs help navigating that space—finding the expertise, career, or hobbies that actually give them energy again.
The other disclaimer is that when I say “lock myself in a room,” I don’t mean just sitting behind my laptop. The learning from Bali after that transition was that _hours behind the laptop are no longer the number one metric._
I think it’s one-third hours behind the laptop, one-third recording and sitting in front of a camera, and one-third creativity, stress management, and space—meditation, reading, taking walks, taking a day off, inner work. That’s probably the best setup.
If we only index on “I need to spend five hours in a coffee shop,” we’re doing the wrong thing. When I say lock in, I’m including meditation, reading, and white space—things that actually move me forward.
My body just isn’t built to be a “lock in for 16 hours a day” type. I hit seven hours, and my brain turns off. Maybe the people doing 16-hour days are biologically different or just better at time management—or maybe not.
Maybe I just need to lean into my own biological advantage—more sensitive, more receptive—and use that.
Listening to Hamza’s videos, I feel like I could do the same thing he did with his _Hamza Unfiltered_ channel. I’m getting consistent feedback from real people—people are interested in my lifestyle. They ask how I do it. They tell me I’m incredibly introspective. People’s jaws drop when I tell them I’ve posted 450 videos on YouTube and another 268 that never saw the light of day.
I think I can grow this YouTube channel. The question is, what’s stopping me? I think it’s perfection—the desire to be right, to not waste people’s time.
And just as I thought that, I wondered if there’s an unworthiness layer underneath. This idea of wanting to be as valuable as possible—not even breathing for three seconds in a video because I’d be “wasting someone’s time.”
So here’s that unworthiness again. How do we fix it? I think the answer is the IFS exercises—I still haven’t tried those. But I will.
And then it’s just getting back into a routine of making videos, going through life, and speaking from the heart. The first five videos won’t be perfect—they’ll probably be shit—but as long as I keep going and communicating, knowing that these YouTube videos are for nurturing, not discovery, it’ll work out.
I’m excited to get back on that train. I’ll do it in Denver for sure. I think what’s holding me back is the same as in Bali—finding a place to work and something to talk about. That’s all I need.
I can overanalyze—say I need to learn better storytelling, communication—but those aren’t prerequisites for making videos. So I think I’ll order a DJI Osmo Pocket 3 with a tripod to remove that setup friction—so I can just hit record anywhere: in front of the van, on a trail, anywhere.
That’ll help massively.
For the new routine, I want to cut laptop time in half to about an hour and a half. So: wake up, go to a coffee shop, write, and then leave at 9:30. Find a park, set up, hit record. Boom—YouTube video done.
I like this idea of one-third laptop, one-third content, one-third creative space—reading, meditation, ideation—as a framework.
I’m a little worried skiing might become another distraction. I keep circling back to this tension: the desire to lock in, build, create—and my lifestyle keeps getting in the way. But maybe it’s actually an upside I can leverage in content.
Because part of what I’m selling _is_ the lifestyle. I’m telling lost, unfulfilled high earners—software engineers, bankers—that their life doesn’t have to look like that. The thing stopping them—their desire for comfort or social status—is holding them back.
I’m showing them that they could travel, work remotely, coach, do whatever—as long as they have Wi-Fi. My job is to help them make that transition and see that it’s possible.
So the real question is: does that message come across better if I lock myself in a room, or if I go skiing and live it? I think the answer is obvious.
I mean, sure, you could say, like, oh, I have enough content. But yeah, it's like, does my message come across at my apartment? If I lock myself in a room and make videos like that? Or if I actually live the life that I'm trying to sell?
So, traveling is actually a feature of business. I just realized that. Van life, travel, skiing, hobbies—they’re part of the business. That’s powerful.
I’m excited. I want more traction with this business, and I’m very close. I feel like I’m at the start of the hockey stick—but I’m not bringing the inputs, like recording content. It’s been two weeks. I’m excited for where this is going.
You just gotta lock in, bro. Lock in.
Listening to Hamza’s videos, I keep thinking—I have so much value to share. Why am I not? It’s probably a mix of limiting belief and too much friction getting started.
There’s also the question of bringing back daily videos—but from a business standpoint, I think the answer is no. Clients would probably benefit more from one video every two or three days—two or three per week feels like a sweet spot.
I also like being present in people’s feeds. If I could do what _Hamza Unfiltered_ did—just talk about learnings, tell stories—and _enjoy_ it, that’d be the unlock.
The key is creating a routine and habit. If I do that and start gaining traction, it’s over. I’ll hit 100K subs. My level of introspection, the stories I can tell, the skills I’ve gained—it’s all there. It’s just my lifestyle getting in the way.
So the answer is: make the habit easy. Get back into it.
Next steps—probably take those outlined video ideas, but also sit, meditate, and download what’s speaking to me now. Pick three ideas, tell a story, hit record, speak for 15 minutes, publish five of those, accept that they’ll suck, and go from there.
The problem comes when I overanalyze—thinking I need a content funnel or a perfect topic. If I just speak from embodiment and experience, that’s the key.
It’s like what Dan Bolton does—YouTube for long-form nurture, short-form reels for surface-level hooks.
My past self was consuming tons of videos like that—if I can be that for him, we’ve won.
Anyway, I’ll call it here. We’re almost there—maybe another 30 minutes. Got some good ideas. Thought I’d just be listening to music, but I listened to podcasts, Hamza videos, recorded this ramble—more productive than expected.
It’s not laptop time, but it’s creating space. Maybe that counts. Anyway, I’ll call it there. See you next time. Peace.
Taking this feeling of the desire to “lock in” and turning into actions and systems:
202511130918 How I'll intentionally lock in over this next van life chapter
#journal #goals #growth
The growing desire to lock in intentionally...
So, I'm back in the van. What's this next chapter look like? I don't want to be my old self. I don't want these next 4 months to just fly by with nothing to show for it.
I don't want to continue to live only for the present (doing what I want), I also want to build for the future.
I've been getting this growing desire to lock in... To actually _intentionally_ address distraction, indecision, friction, areas of my life where I want to grow more. To essentially coach myself with accountability and using all the tools I know and have.
## Identity Change Activity
[...]
Okay great, from this, I got:
- [x] Document my goals, the version of myself I'm becoming, the areas of life I want to make progress in.
- [x] Break these down into daily and weekly habits
- [x] Update HUB note with
- [x] Image of that version of myself
- [x] What I'm actively working on
- [x] Habit tracker
- [x] Make it stupid obvious to see 1. where I am, 2. where I'm going
- [x] Update weekly note with reflection and iteration prompts
## Intentionality
Like I said in this morning's podcast, I want this chapter to be much more intentional. I know where I'm going now. I know my business direction. There are no more excuses about "I don't know where I'm going." Now it's about actually taking action on those things.
I'm trying to balance this line between enjoying my life (travel, skiing, van life) with actually building for my future.
Think of the extremes:
A. Me in 2022 van life, just driving around, journaling a bunch, skiing, backpacking Europe, no responsibilities
B. Me in Kuala Lumpur February 2025, metaphorically locked in my room just working, building, sacrificing to build for a better future.
People _need_ me... They need me to show up. They need me to build this business and serve. They need me to become the version of myself that I _see_ on stage speaking to 3,000.
If I don't show up and build intentionally right now, people will suffer, they will continue to live in pain and regret.
My future wife and kids also need me to build this business and life that can sustain more than just myself.
## Areas of Life
[[202511130952 The next version of Peter on self-improvement]]
- Areas of life to focus on
- Knowledge I need to gain
- Habits I need to do
- One-off tasks
## Actions
Creating: [[202511131036 ✅ Habit Tracker]]
Weekly habits
- Starting social exchanges, dates
- Stress management
- Belief system work
Daily habits
- Meditation
- Reading
- Journaling
- Weight training
- Stretching and flexibility training
- Consistent sleep and diet
- Semen retention
One-off
- Update clothing wardrobe
## Changes
What do I need to actually focus on that I'm not really doing?
- Creating content
- Social skills work - social exchanges, dates
- Meditation
- Reading
- Journaling
- Stretching
- Stress management work
- Belief system work
- More intentional semen retention
## Goals
By March 1st, 2026...
- I'm actively serving 5 clients.
- I'm making over $3,500 per month.
- I'm making content every day.
- I'm skiing 3 times per week.
- I'm meditating, reading, journaling, and stretching every day.
- I'm going on 1 date a week.
- I'm speaking to strangers effortlessly.
- I'm pushing my comfort zone every week.
- I'm reflecting on failures and designing habits intentionally.
## Weekly Reflection Prompts
Updating [[202411200826 Weekly note template]] and [[202401061626 Daily note template]]
- Where am I living in "maybe" instead of clear yes/no?
- Where's my edge of discomfort right now?
- Where have I gotten too comfortable?
- What discomforts did my past self pursue that made a difference in my current self?
- What's a risk I can take this week that has an asymmetrical upside?
- What's a habit that's slipping? Is it still meaningful? If so, how can I make it easier to complete?
- What's a mistake or failure I made this week? What did I learn? What can I change?
- Wins from the week? What's going well?
- What's alive in me right now?
- Where am I feeling flow? Where am I feeling friction?
- What's some advice I gave that I can apply to my own life?
- Where did I feel fear? Where did fear take over my actions?
- Not, "How can I make sense of this?" -> What's this trying to show me?
- Where did I feel emotional voltage, fire, passion this week?
- 1. Where did I trust intuition and it worked out?
- 2. Where did I overthink and stall?
- 3. What micro-risk will I take next week?
- What rewards am I reaping because of investments or delayed gratification at my past self did? Now what sacrifices and investments can I make now and today that my future self will reap the rewards of?
[more...]
Some reflections on the week:
202511160807 Brain dump - Frank & Roze
#journal
Mornin'
Here at Frank & Roze in Denver this morning! Back to van life, ahhh it feels good man. Feeling like this is gonna be a good chapter.
Getting my 5 minutes of journaling in today.
Here's a GPT prompt:
“Where did I feel a spark of momentum or relief this week — even for just five seconds — and what small decision or system contributed to that feeling?”
- Turning the key in my van and hearing it start up after 11 months sitting there. The _relief_ in that moment.
- Some moments in the last 2 days in the van getting admin things done. These little moments of "ah, I need to go to the back to get that tool," feeling the "should I do it now?" and then going "do it now" and doing it. That micro-action and pushing through those little discomforts instead of letting them accumulate.
- Listening to podcasts while on my road trip to Kansas and Denver and then also recording these podcast audios while driving, getting the ideas flowing, coaching myself. Feeling momentum.
- Turning this subtle feeling of wanting to "lock in" this van life chapter, recording a podcast on my drive into Little Bear Coffee in Albuquerque, then breaking it down into the micro of behavior change and habits. Then actually starting to use my new [[202511131036 ✅ Habit Tracker]].
- [...]
Small decisions:
- Feeling the ideas inside my head flowing -> opening the Recorder app and hitting record.
- Hearing the thought and feeling of needing to make some effort, questioning if I should do it now or add to my todo list -> Recognizing it, pushing through the discomfort, and doing it.
- Recognizing this feeling of desire -> Talking my way through it, what is it, why, how can I actually turn it into behavior change.
- Recognizing a slip in my ideal behavior -> Coaching my way through it verbally out loud, asking how I can tweak something to make it not happen again.
- Feeling this resistance feeling -> Verbalizing it, hearing it, feeling it.
Noice I like these, I'm seeing the pattern.
What’s Next?
Back to the grind