The Week I Became A Regular At The Phuket Strip Clubs

This Week:

  • The play-by-play from 3 nights of strip clubs.
  • My ego taking over control of my workouts.
  • The things I learned in the past week in Phuket.

March 2024

Su M T W Th F S

Where In The World Was I?

  • 🇹🇭 Pa Tong, Phuket, Thailand
  • 🚐 to Ao Nang
  • 🇹🇭 Ao Nang, Krabi, Thailand

Live Travel Map 🌎

Metrics From The Week

Hands down the worst week I’ve had in terms of sleep and recovery in the past 9 months… I mean anything in the red is a BIG flag. But it was a conscious trade, more on that later.

*I did an upper body functional workout last Sunday 3/17/24 but my GPS was so far off that I deleted the Strava activity

**And Saturday was the day I left to Ao Nang.

Business Progress Update

This week was tough, for obvious reasons if you keep reading 😅 My main focus still has been how can I get those early adopters and have been trying to work my network inside 1MH before going further out.

I’ve had conversations with a couple guys trying to really focus on learning from their perspective of how they currently generate video ideas and what their pain points are rather than pitching up front. I think I’ve brought up (soft-pitch) that I’m building software to solve this problem to 2-3 guys so far? One actually gave some valuable feedback (rather than “wow that’s a good idea”) that he likes to rely more on the manual process of looking at other creator video titles rather than using software.

The other thing was I saw an Instagram post from @HubermanLab asking the community for suggestions for podcast topics and guests. I thought oh my god this is literally what my site does. I ended up sending the HubermanLab team an email with all their data from the past 12 weeks of comments as an upfront value with a soft ask that if they want more to let me know. No response yet though, but I do like the validation!

So all in all it’s been a slow week. I’ve very much been behind on responding to conversations and contributing to the group compared to last week.

But as some of the conversations have somewhat dried up, I still need users.

The next problem I’ve hit is how do I find other small to medium sized creators out there in the sea of millions of creators that are like me – similar niche, similar mindset, similar topics, etc.?

This isn’t a new problem/idea for me, but this week I decided that one of the ways I could help reign my focus in and at least do SOMETHING productive in the mornings is to try to start solving this.

I don’t know how much of a rabbit hole this is, but I figure it might at least be worth exploring…

So onto MVP 2, or 1.B. or something like that 😅

I started coding a script this week that pulls creators from YouTube search, scrapes their video titles, and uses a custom algorithm with… AI and… BIG DATA… and MACHINE LEARNING… and [insert other hot keywords 😂] to generate a “similarity score” based on how closely their videos are to a target creator’s (me).

It’s actually pretty cool.

But “cool” doesn’t equate to value or money… (yet?). The line I’m trying to balance here is how far do I go down this rabbit hole? At what point do I stop coding and start taking the results of the script (the similar creators it found in my niche) and reaching out to get users for CommentCompass. But at the same time, this script/algorithm could be a separate MVP, or subset of CC, or feature of CC.

I don’t have an answer but I’m just trying to continue to be productive with the cards I was dealt chose to deal myself this week 😂.

Becoming A Regular At The Strip Club 🤪

So as a recap at the end of last week’s post (after 2 nights out), I started to wonder if maybe the challenge and discomfort of going to a strip club was not something to run from, but rather lean into as a method for growth and improving my social anxiety.

Did it work? 🧐 I’ll share my thoughts at the end.

Tuesday Night

After a couple nights recovering my sleep, I went back out on Tuesday night in pursuit of discomfort.

I tried out this other club. It was a lot bigger, more like a “club” than a small bar.

It was almost completely empty 😂

The server brought me to the corner sets (5 tables?) and there was one other couple sitting there. I didn’t see anyone else in there.

But, I managed to relax a bit, get comfortable, bop to the music, and just chill. I got a beer here.

One girl came over, we chatted a bit, she got on top of me, eventually asked for a drink, I wasn’t feeling the vibes so I said no and she left.

THAT moment right there (which ended up happening a good handful of times this week) was really uncomfortable. The girl walks off and you’re sitting there alone. It’s like you can FEEL the eyes from everyone looking at you.

Why did she leave? Oooo he said no to buying a drink, definitely stay away from that guy. Social rejection, all that kinda stuff

I felt the urge to grab my beer and finish the rest of it so I could quickly leave.

But I caught myself in this moment and was like “hold on hold on, you feel incredibly uncomfortable right now.. Lean into it, put the beer back down, chill.”

I stayed for another 2 songs or so then bounced.

Extra details from the journal:

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The recommendations I got from the guy who I talked to last week mentioned this club that I just went to and the one that I went to on Saturday (the smaller more intimate club at the end with the foam whackers and the fun vibe). So without really knowing where else to go (a common theme in my travels 😂), I went back to that club I went to on Saturday.

And it was packed… Wow, on a Tuesday?

I got this really awkward small seat along the wall in front of the air vent so the bench was half as wide as the rest of the wall. I was physically uncomfortable, but I kinda splayed out and managed to relax a bit.

Literally the first girl that sat next to me, we had an exchange, then she went, “you’ve… been here before right? I recognize you”

I laughed, “yes”… 😂

We chatted a bit more, said “maybe later” to the drink question, and she eventually left.

The next girl that came by and sat down, again, we had an exchange and she eventually mentioned “I remember you, you were sitting over there last time, right”

I laughed again but with more embarrassment this time 😂

Same thing happened. I think I talked to a third girl briefly but she didn’t mention anything.

Then I made eye contact with the girl I talked to on Saturday (while she was dancing) and SHE recognized me 😂😂

BRO I went on SATURDAY, it’s been 2 full nights I haven’t been there… What is going on.

She eventually came over and said hi to me and that she had a customer that she was with.

I stayed ~3 rotations, then headed out. The energy in there was REALLY fun. There was a group of guys that came in and every time one of the girls would whack a guy with the foam thing, all his friends would turn around and start whacking him too 😂

That night was really fun. I left thinking “I’d go back honestly 😂”

Extra details from the journal:

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Video references:

  • No public YouTube video about this night.
  • Private video for future Peter: 27 minute morning video recorded Wednesday 3/20/24

Wednesday Night

Another night, another pursuit of discomfort.

But this time I wasn’t gonna go back to the same place, that’d be too weird. There were 2-3 other places under the same ownership, so my plan was to go to those this night, check them out, then head home.

The first place I went to was a similar small-ish bar vibe, big table in the middle with poles.

But it was almost completely empty 😂 I think there were 4-5 other groups of people in there out of like 20-25 seats/tables.

Immediately these 2 girls sit down next to me as I arrive.

However this time instead of ordering a beer, I decided I’d change things up. Someone left this comment on one of my YouTube videos:

You are doing amazing. One suggestion though, drinking/buying drinks for others are ways of protecting yourself from rejection. Whenever you are ready consider spending NO money on drinks for yourself or others… yes.. even in bars and clubs. completely sober.. You will unlock a new level of transformation.

If this was you, thank you. It made me think. All these clubs have free entry but you’re expected to buy a drink, so I didn’t think this was feasible.

Except… I remembered that they have non-alcoholic drinks on the menu.

And so I literally thought, “what would be the most uncomfortable thing to do here?”

I ordered a tonic 😂 That’s it. Nothing with it.

And MAN the confidence boost from that, holy cow.

I felt REALLY good in there, really relaxed, comfortable seat, bopping to the music.

The vibe in there wasn’t great (mostly because it was empty) EXCEPT…

I looked over to the seats on the other side of the table/stage and this bartender guy is standing there chatting with this girl dancing to the music, super animated, just vibing, and had this really flamboyant energy.

I started laughing, my god this guy’s energy is so good right now. He was dancing better than the girls were 😬

He eventually looked over and I got his eye contact and I motioned with my hand towards the staged and said “BRO GET UP THERE” 🤣🤣🤣 Ohhh man that was so funny. He laughed with this huge smile and kept dancing.

I eventually finished my tonic and decided “onto the next.” He gave me a hug on the way out 😂

Extra details from the journal:

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The 3rd place under the same name was completely empty outside, nobody with signs trying to get you in, so I skipped that one and went back to the club I went to first on Tuesday night.

This time is was totally packed and poppin’!

The girl walking me in put me at a stool RIGHT under a table of dancers 😂🤦‍♂️ I don’t know if it was intentional but I thought “allllllright fine, yes, this is the MOST uncomfortable seat you could’ve picked for me…”

And then I ordered an orange juice 😂

The seat was more uncomfortable and I couldn’t really get a good comfortable position to sit in, but I tried my best to bounce to the music and relax.

I think I talked to 2 girls in there that came up to me. One stayed for a little longer and eventually gave me the “drink ultimatum” of either buy a drink for her or else (I didn’t hear the “or else” clause). I alllllmost bought her a drink but said “no” yet again.

She stormed off 😬 and AGAIN felt incredibly uncomfortable in that moment (GOOD!).

But I think as a result, I again drank my orange juice a little too quickly.

The bartender came by, took my empty glass and asked if I wanted another one. I declined.

I sat there bopping to the music, lookin’ around.

Eventually the bartender came back by and asked if I wanted another drink. I kind of wavered my head, she said something like “you just want a water?”

I said “you have water?” and looked at the menu.

But then I couldn’t find it and thought “eh I might just leave” so I said thank you and declined.

By now it had been, I dunno, 15 minutes or something like that? I was getting mentally ready to leave when all of a sudden…

The bartender comes back over and over my right shoulder DROPS the menu in front of me and shines her flashlight at it. I didn’t hear what she said but it was a “buy another f*cking drink or leave” type of tone. And literally half a second later one of the girls from the stage (who I hadn’t even made eye contact with) comes over and whacks me on the back with a foam thing.

I said “I’m just gonna leave,” got up, and left.

And BOY did that feel conflicting and uncomfortable as I left.

Oh my gosh I just got kicked out, I did something wrong, I got in trouble 😳 I was probably so disrespectful to everyone in there, what are they gonna think about me?

But at the same time I thought…

No! This is good! You’re uncomfortable. You hit the boundary. PERFECT. This is just another rep of getting “in trouble.”

Extra details from the journal:

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So ending a bit sooner than I wanted and with no 3rd place to go to… I thought fuck it, and went back to the place I ended up on Saturday and Tuesday.

One of the guys outside at the door smiles at me and goes “heyyyy welcome back!” 😂

I was sooooo uncomfortable. And layer on top of that, all the outer seats were taken except for the stools right under the dancers.

I’m like oh no 😂🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️ FIIINNNneeeeee, I just did this so I can do it again 😂

It kind of feels like you’re in the hot seat, it’s very exposed to not have your back up against the wall.

I made some eye contact with the girls and got a good handful of those eyes that lock for long enough you can see the gears turning like “wait I’ve seen this guy before” 😂 But I laughed and they smiled.

It was some combination of feeling exposed right below the table, on somewhat of an uncomfortable seat, but also I kept worrying that I had talked to a handful of girls in there and specifically NOT bought them drinks, so what would they think of me when they saw me? Why would they come back and try again? I felt super uncomfortable, but eventually started to loosen up and had a fair share of getting whacked with the foam things and whacking them back 😜

I had a good bit of eye contact with this one girl and thought she was gonna come over but she went over to this other guy, the same “customer” that I saw in that same seat the night before.

By the next rotation we had almost ZERO eye contact. Then I tried to give her a tip on my way out but she shook her head and secretly pointed over to the corner where the “customer” was as if to say “sorry the customer I’m with over there won’t let me accept tips from anyone else.”

I got up and left, I was pissed. I mean not really, but to not buy literally anyone any drinks, then to find someone I want to show some appreciation towards and being DENIED because of the guy in the corner… 😤

I left thinking, I guess that’s that, I don’t really have a reason to go back to any clubs now, but it was SUCH a good well-rounded night.

I left out so many details, sorry, but you get the idea.

Extra details from the journal:

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Video references:

Friday Night

I gave it a full day/night on Thursday to re-prioritize my sleep. Knowing I’d be leaving Saturday, Friday night was my last night to do anything else here in Phuket.

And man, I thought about it at multiple points during the day.

On the back of Wednesday night’s drama, I had the idea to try going back one last time early (to beat this “customer”) and talk to this one girl, literally no one else. She had great energy, I just wanted to get to know her as a person and what he’s interested in like that girl from Saturday.

The longer and longer I debated and thought about it, the MORE uncomfortable I got with the idea of going back for literally my 4th time to this club.

Ohhh it’s gonna be so awkward man, literally everyone in there recognizes me. Is it getting to the “too weird” stage? Are people gonna think I’m a creep or weirdo?

But I had this open loop that I needed to close. I noticed I started to put this girl on a pedestal, making it even more uncomfortable to do.

And the more awkward I felt about it, the more I thought, fuck man, the fact that I feel so uncomfortable about this is the REASON I should go.

I walked Bangla road up and down once around 8:15pm (they opened at 8pm) and felt SO nervous. I could feel my stomach sinking with the thought of everyone seeing me in there yet again.

But alas, I show up.

Like Wednesday, the girl outside at the door immediately smiles when she sees me. I smile back and literally put my hand up over my face in embarrassment.

I get in and take one of the outer seats on the left (actually, the same on that this “customer” was in).

I felt SO awkward in there – arm across my chest, hand covering my chin, kind of slouched down in my seat as if trying to just hide. My body language was NOT good.

But I was in there on a mission. A singular mission.

I found and made eye contact with this girl, laughed, and covered my eyes. She eventually gets down from the stage and walks over to the other corner to sit with these old guys (not the same guy) and I’m like oh, my, god are you serious right now. But I just see her sitting in the corner next to the guys, not interacting with them, and yawning every couple minutes, just looking out into space like she’s bored.

Another girl comes over, we start chatting, I decide to buy her a drink to try to wait it out. We have some nice back and forth and eventually she goes “you come here every day 😄”

I’m like 😂 “okay let’s not be EXTREME here, I wasn’t here yesterday 😅” (thinking, YOU’RE NOT HELPING 😂😂😂😂)

But I asked HER what the girl’s name was and that was absolutely clutch. Later when I saw the first girl (from Saturday; gosh I hope you’re not confused by all the girls I’m referencing without names 😂) I asked her if this girl had a customer.

And that was double clutch because when the old guys left, she went over and pointed to me.


Finally, after I don’t even know, 3 nights, lots of eye contact, energy exchange back and forth, and being denied tipping this girl, she finally sits down next to me.

I asked for her name, complimented her smile, and bought her a drink. A bit later I asked what happened on Wednesday.

She just responded with this glazed and confused look to her like she half didn’t understand what I said and half was trying to remember.

I started to put together that I don’t think she spoke a LICK of English besides a literal handful of phrases 😂

We ended up chatting… sitting… next to each other for a while. 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

At one point I asked her how long she’d been dancing for (I literally don’t know what else to say in these situations), she looked over for the clock and said 45 minutes 😂🤦‍♂️ No, I meant months 😂 That’s happened a couple times in the past week and it’s usually my indicator that there’s a significant language barrier.

Every so often she kept yawning and holding her head like she had a headache/fever.

I’m sorry but her energy was SO BAD 😂 I was not expecting that.

I stayed long enough to buy her one more drink, then she went to dance. I was gonna leave after that but she came back and I got cornered into buying one more 😅

Things escalated a micro-step from there but it was still just awkward sitting next to each other 😅

She finally had to dance again, I gave her a tip and left.

All in all, I’m grateful I went back. I closed the loop and more importantly I faced a situation that I was INCREDIBLY uncomfortable with.

Onto the next.

Extra details from the journal:

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Video references:

  • No public YouTube video about this night.
  • Private video for future Peter: 26 minute morning video recorded Saturday 3/23/24

Losing Control Of My Ego

Coming off of 2 months in Malaysia and with all the people and Thai massage ladies around Phuket, it was hard to gain ANY resemblance of control of my ego this week. I went on shirtless runs or workouts every day this week despite the absolute TRASH recoveries scores I had.

Why the f*ck am I going on a 25 minute run until exhaustion in the blazing heat of Thailand on an 18% recovery score?

Ohhhhh because my ego just wants the attention. I get it now.

Note for future self: I got the best/most reactions from the Thai massage places on the one-way road south, “Rat Uthit Song Roi Pi Rd,” towards the south part of town 😉

I literally couldn’t NOT go on a run or workout no matter how tired I felt…

I talked about this in this video: I can’t control my ego anymore, it just wants the attention

It also didn’t help the fact that all (okay, 3) of the front desk girls at my hostel were flirting with me and I was flirting back 😂 (just playful energy exchange). Every time I came back in, “Petterrrrrrrrrrr!”

… and all the girls (Thai ladies, girls at clubs I went to) that were touching my arms and chest and abs.

… and the respect/nod thumbs up I got from a guy on a run and the eyes I was getting from another guy working out at the outdoor gym.

… and those are just the ones that I saw.

Most of the time I wasn’t actively listening for what these Thai ladies were saying, I had my headphones in and was in “focus” mode. But I couldn’t ignore the fact that I run by and through my headphones here “ow ow ow,” “woowwwwww,” and “oooOOOOoooo.”

After every run I’d go into 7-Eleven to get 2 protein shakes (they’re freakin’ EVERYWHERE here in Thailand; and it feels like walking into a freezer because they have the A/C blasting).

Naturally I wouldn’t put my shirt back on. I mean it’s a beach town, I’m not the only one.

But it was always the walk back to the hostel… Walking back with my headphones on my hat, not on my ears, walking at a slow pace, THOSE moments were a lot of discomfort walking by all the Thai massage ladies.

I mentioned in a video how I wanted to start leaning into the energy play back and forth with these ladies…

One walk back after a run, I pass by this place, shirt off, drenched in sweat, hat covering most of my forehead/eyes.

I look over and land my eyes on this girl sitting there.

We make eye contact.

But right as I hit that threshold of “normal eye contact duration” and felt the thought to look away, I thought wait, this girl’s kinda cute, so I held it and SHE HELD IT as I walked by.

Then I gave her a little squinty eyes and a smirk towards the end.

And right as I pass by I see out of the very corner of my eye she jumps out of her seat, lunges towards me, and whacks my butt with the menu card thing she’s holding.

I literally jumped, turned around, and both of us were laughing 😂😂

Your Future Self Is Watching

All that said, running to exhaustion is SUCH a good feeling. All the chatter in the mind just goes to silence. All that’s left is pain and the drive to push through it.

And I’ve been a lot more impressed with what I’m seeing in the mirror lately. I finally feel like I’m filling out. I mean it’s really not that much, but it is a difference. It also helps to be coated in suncreen (i.e. oil) and sweat 🤪

  • Left – August 22nd, 2022 (170.4lb/77.3kg)
  • Middle – September 2nd, 2022 (+1.5 weeks but better lighting, 169.2lb/76.7kg)
  • Right – March 16th, 2024 (haven’t weighed myself in about a month, maybe something like 182lb/82.5kg?)

This has prompted this idea that I keep coming back to:

“You are where you are because of the work that your past self put in.”

The only reason I look like this is because since June 2022 I have 1. showed up to the gym/worked out 203 times, and 2. prioritized eating until I’m full.

That’s it.

There’s nothing else.

Nobody gave this to me. I have plenty of luck and privilege to be (and that I am) grateful for in the rest of my entire life, but this wasn’t luck. This was work. And I’m not even close to where I want to get nor my potential, but it’s progress.

That perspective, every single time, completely changes my mindset.

What’s my future self thinking about me right now, tired and just not feeling like doing a workout today?

If I’m grateful for all the moments my past self put in the work… Then my future self is gonna be grateful for me showing up today.

Always remember that your future self is watching.

Views From The Week

What Did I Learn In Phuket?

I did some reflecting because this was quite the week of experiences…

Thailand vs. Reality

Is any of the attention I got in Phuket a representation of reality? I mean what IS reality? Is a western country considered reality? Is Thailand not a reality?

The thing I realized as I reflected on this was that everyone here (at least the girls at the club and massage ladies) are incentivized to get your attention.

For the clubs, it’s literally their job to give you attention, hold eye contact, and make sure you’re having a good time.

For the Thai massage ladies, they’ll touch your shoulder, chest, grab your arm, and hold your eye contact because they want you to stop and have a massage with them.

And these both come in the context of a “sexual” nature/situation, so it makes sense. If I’m in the checkout line at the grocery store and all of a sudden a girl comes up and starts grabbing and stroking my arm, I might call the police 😅

So I think all of that context is important to remember or else I might go back to Europe/U.S./etc, go on a shirtless run and think wait what happened to all the attention I was getting in Thailand?

It’s just amplified here.

Social Skills

On the back of being incentivized to approach people in the strip club, I also realized that all the girls there are 100% comfortable in their own skin.

Nobody in there was awkward or nervous (on the side of the strip club; some of the guys in there… 😅). There was one girl that approached me and said something like “You’re handsome. I’m really shy, I walked by you twice before coming up to you.”

I can tell you from a social skills perspective, it’s kind of like easy-mode.

The other thing was that I started to pick up on the questions that they’d ask. It was almost always the same.

“What’s your name?”

“Where are you from?”

“How long are you staying in Phuket?”

“How old are you?”

However, as for what to say AFTER that, I still have no idea. What the heck do people talk about in a situation like that?… Maybe I’m asking the wrong question here 😅 I don’t know that strip clubs are the best place for deep conversations about life 😂

Whether or not the strip clubs helped the social anxiety or they were a result of increased social confidence, I don’t know. That said, even doing what I did is a HUGE amount of evidence that I’ve stacked up for my future self to look back upon.

You Get What You Put In

This feels like such a general life lesson. It’s all mindset and perspective.

I was most interested in interacting with the girls (and Thai massage ladies) who had a playful, fun, positive energy who were smiling and having fun. I acknowledge that this industry/scene is and can be a big grey area… but I’m just here to make an observation.

Speaking for myself, I think if I had gone in on that 4th night with a better energy rather than feel embarrassed for coming back, I may have had a better experience.

This isn’t just a strip club idea… One of the things I started to recognize in Bali was just how friendly and nice everyone was. I went to cafes and restaurants and everyone working there was incredibly respectful and always smiled.

When I flew to Singapore over New Year’s, one of the observations I made was the stark change in interactions with baristas. I remember documenting this on a video but I don’t think I posted it. I had a lot of dry and straight-faced interactions. Coming from Bali where it felt like everyone was your family, this felt like nobody was family…

You Just Need The Right Tools

Frankly I wasn’t sure I was gonna make it through Phuket on semen retention but I did. If it were gonna happen anywhere, it was gonna happen there…

I still have so much to learn, but it feels like I just needed the right tools to use.

None of what happened in Phuket would’ve happened the same without SR, no shot. It required an elevated level of confidence and suppressed overthinking mind, both of which I’ve gained in the past month.

On a similar vein, some of this has been complicated by an absolute trash sleep schedule and thus resulting energy, but I’ve felt a lot more sensitive to the pleasure in music this week.

I talked about this in this video: Feeling more sensitive to the little pleasures in life, what’s changed?

Food From The Week

I basically ate at the same places every day 😅

🚐 Off To Ao Nang

I took this mini-bus/taxi right from my hostel up and around to Ao Nang inside Krabi (~3 hr drive, ~4.5 hr trip time)

All 3 bus drivers (2 transfers) were driving the road like it’s the Nürburgring race track – driving down the middle of the 2 lanes (same direction lanes), swinging wide, crossing over the dotted lanes and over the white boundary line, cutting the corners in close by the bushes, then accelerating out of the turn, swinging wide into the second lane… No turn signals, no checking blind spots, just sending it 😂 Ahhhh Thailand, never change 🥹

It’s kind of insanely beautiful here, but it hasn’t truly hit me quite yet…

Interesting Content From The Week

9 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was 20 (from Sam Ovens) – fantastic video, great lessons.

Content Creation Tactics For 2024 (from GaryVee) – shoutout to GaryVee with this one, fantastic talk.

George Janko PRESSED by Jordan Peterson on S*X Before Marriage @GeorgeJanko (from Ruslan KD) – I like the way this guy talks, his vulnerability, his authenticity. Really interesting conversation. I’m impressed.

How Men Can Get A Good Woman – “Girls Gone Bible” | EP. 51 (from George Janko) – Man this was fascinating to watch and listen to… I like the idea of using religion as a framework for values and what is good. The thing I noticed listening to this was this feeling of cringe and discomfort every time they spoke about Jesus as if he was real, speaking to them, directing them, etc. with such confidence and conviction. That just sounded and made me feel uncomfortable, but I don’t quite know why… Something I haven’t journaled about or thought about yet, I was watching this on Saturday. Just wanted to share the observation though.

What’s Next?

Taking in the beauty 🙂 and recovering the sleep schedule 😬


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