This Week:
- Feeling off for a couple of days this week and how I got through it.
- My new workout partner at the gym.
- Some behind the scenes thoughts from this week – motivation, discipline, and on taking breaks.
February 2025
| Su | M | T | W | Th | F | S |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 2/1 |
| 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 |
| 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 |
| 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 3/1 |
Where In The World Was I?
- 🇹🇷 Kadıköy (still part of Istanbul)
Metrics From The Week
I’ll talk more about the red recoveries below, just glad I recovered! Still not quite sure what happened.
First time I’ve worked out 4 times in one week in maybe a looooong time. Having a gym 2 blocks away is so clutch.
VideoHawk.co Update
So back in The Week Of Settling In To Granada Life (August 18th, 2024), I threw together a basic “top resonating topics” on my Audience Explorer page. But recently I’ve wanted more insights into the questions people are asking.
Fortunately, just two weeks ago I went deep into creating a topic modeling system, so I just threw some code together, updated the UI so you can click+filter comments, and boom I had a better way to understand the topics that people are asking about.
It’s not perfect (none of my software’s features are perfect, but each time I improve something I just make it incrementally better), some of the topics aren’t good, but it’s a whole lot better. Gonna use it and get some user feedback then decide where to go next from here.
Breaking Down Fulfillment
My hypothesis is that fulfillment and purpose are “vegetables” and not “candy” types of content, but I felt good about this video that went out last week.
I spent a while scripting it, then cut it down a lot. Recording in my own private room, I felt much more comfortable speaking. I also felt like the script was organized in such a way that I basically had a single take for each section, not needing to cut out silences, thinking, stumbling, etc.
So, progress!
Unfortunately I didn’t feel as comfortable while speaking for the next video I recorded, so still working on applying the learnings I get from each improvement.
Pics From The Week
It’s been cold! And rainy! Kind of not ideal… but considering where I’m headed next, I figured I’ll miss not being sweaty within microseconds of stepping outside very day 😅, so just be grateful for it while it’s there.
It was also cloudy for what felt like forever. The sun finally came out towards the end of the week and oh my lord I could FEEL the dopamine rise just being outside, it was crazy.
Trash Recovery Scores
So somewhat out of the blue my recovery score just went into the dumpster. My stomach just felt a little off-normal, bit of discomfort, headache here and there, slower mentally, more groggy.
The next day it jumped up to 30% and I felt a bit better, so I thought I was on the upswing.
I decided to work out.
Then woke up with it back at 1% 😅 so I slowed it down a bit and took a bit of a rest day. I spent a good number of hours on my bed on my phone watching videos and scrolling social media. In the evening I went for a walk.
Fortunately it seemed to pass after a couple days and I got back to feeling normal. Not sure what ended up happening, but hey it wasn’t too bad so I’ll take it. Seemed like some mild food poisoning type of “bug” or acclimating to some new gut bacteria, rather than catching a cold from someone.
I tried my best to just prioritize getting enough sleep.
But the phone on the bed habit seemed to stick around. I was pretty good about the rest of my routine, but it’s those evenings.
I would spend maybe 30-45 minutes on YouTube or social media the whole day, go to the gym, eat dinner, and then come back and just not be able to do anything else besides pass the time until I went to sleep.
I understand that “I’m exhausted from work I just want to put the TV on for a bit” response. It’s tough.
This content is not ready to be made public yet.
Blueberries and Oranges
I probably went to this market 4 to 5 times a week and always bought blueberries and oranges. Apparently oranges and pomegranates are grown extensively in Mediterranean/Turkey region. I saw them everywhere. And the oranges were unbelievably good.
Why? Because I didn’t eat any fruit during my meals otherwise. These felt like the best bang for my buck nutritionally to just grind every day.
The guys started to recognize me pretty quickly. I couldn’t figure out what one of them kept saying to me, but I think he was trying to get me to buy the pineapple. All I understood was “very good” “very good” 😄
New Gym Workout Coach
This cat seemed to be a regular at the gym. She was pretty “cold” though. You pet her and she just kinda walks away.
I mean just look at her face here 😂 Like “uh, can I help you?”
But anyways, one workout I crouched down to pet her, then walked off.
Halfway through my workout she came down from upstairs, then sat at the bottom of the steps watching everyone.
Then she walked over at sat on my towel.
Then jumped up on the bench and came over for some snuggles 😂
And followed me to watch me do my abs 😂
And then sat on my lap while I was doing my stretches.
Not such a grumpy cat after all, huh! 😄
Food From The Week
Family Style
Something I gathered from many of the restaurants here was this kind of “family” feel to them.
This place Falfool, was great. The food kind of took a while, but when I looked in the back when I got up to pay, it was this old smiling couple in the back. I just got the impression that they made everything from scratch. No “throw the food in the microwave” type of deal. You could tell it was made with care and love.
And I stopped by this dessert shop. The guy barely spoke any English but he pulled up Google Translate 😄 I was looking at the menu and he pointed to this one (the one I got) and said something like “this one” *chef kiss* That was enough for me, so I got it 😄
It took maybe 10 minutes to heat up in the oven, he kept checking on it, turning them, flipping them. I asked him how long he’d been living there. 30 years!
And I took a picture of the kitchen. It doesn’t scream “commercialized franchise business industrial style kitchen.” But I like that. It feels like I’m getting food from family.
(Whatever they were (Gül Katmer), they were very good)
Thoughts From The Week
On motivation and discipline…
202502091924 There are people living more boring lives than you still showing up every day
#journal #motivation #purpose #discipline
Something I've been starting to think about and realize as I begin to frequent the same places as I travel (I'm in Kadikoy right now), is recognizing the people working the markets and restaurants.
- The convenience store guy who made the fresh juices (Zendali market) outside Archeo cafe and hostel in Istanbul. I would say "one juice, large, please" and with a kind of grin he would quicken his pace, start throwing things in the juicer "apple? carrot? orange?" There was just this underlying feeling that buying a juice from him gave him this sense of satisfaction.
- The guy working at Fit Mill or the Sali Pazari market or Vintage coffee in Kadikoy. Seeing them say in day out, show up, open the shop, and serve people.
I contrast that with my sort of mindset that I've developed, listening to my body and mind, taking breaks, working hard then resting. Then I see these people, maybe objectively with less money or "privilege" than me, continue to show up day in day out.
I can't quite put it into words. It's just interesting.
"Perspective" is the best word to describe this.
Reflecting on my time in Istanbul (the good and the bad) and the struggle for “breaks”…
202502141055 Reflecting on my time in Istanbul
#journal #80-20
Time: 1 hr 5 min
Context (where was I since last 80/20):
- [[202501311153 An 80-20 check-in analysis for business and personal]]
- I leave Istanbul to Kuala Lumpur Sunday (it's Friday). I wanted to get another little check in to reflect on the first ~6 weeks of the year, Porto and Istanbul, and take a snapshot before flying back to SE Asia.
What's going well?
- Found a great area and place to stay here in Kadikoy, Istanbul. Nest digital nomad house, $20/night, own room, great place to work. Healthy food places (fit mill, flake, village coffee) that have great food, and tons of great places to eat dinner. Everything is affordable. Gym that's affordable literally 2 blocks away.
- I've been eating well here in Kadikoy, much better than Istanbul side.
- And it's been so good to get back into the gym and SO nice to have it literally 2 blocks away. The excuses are reduced. There's no 12 minute run or having to go somewhere far.
- Been finding a decent routine with generating video ideas, scripting YouTube videos. Started scripting shorts videos and recorded my first 3! Just haven't edited them yet.
- I feel like I'm getting better at scripting and storytelling.
- Booked my flight to Kuala Lumpur for Sunday!
- It's been a great 6 weeks. I guess I wasn't expecting to be in Europe this long, but I'd say it's been worth it so far. Good experiences.
- Sleep has been pretty good. I got over whatever bug I got pretty quickly and it wasn't that bad.
- I want to make this journaling/reflection into a video I post. I like the title "All I do is work and gym" but as I thought about it, it's not technically true. Yeah all I do is work and gym, but I get to do it from new places every couple weeks. And that's an opportunity not everyone has.
- I've been really liking this 12-week year system: quarterly goals, then broken down to weekly goals, and relating each daily goal to the week. I've felt a lot more focused on what matters.
- Man I feel like I'm at that rubber band snapping point. I feel like I'm right there. I'm one video away, one short away from more people resonating with my story, getting the chance to help more people, and getting more people into my software.
- I like the business model behind systematizing YouTube. I've come across some other people recently on X building in public and building software and I see ideas like todo list apps and a platform to upload your content to all the platforms. It's like, yeah I see the need but some of these ideas are just so over-done. I still see this opportunity here with personalized video ideas, building an authentic audience.
- I've gotten some good social exchange comments added to my [[202403141834 🗣️ Social skills log]]
80/20:
- Optimizing my routine
- Work - Finding a digital nomad house/co-working space.
- Food - healthy food and grocery stores close
- Price - affordable
- Exercise - gym next door
- Sleep - prioritizing sleep
- Working on things that challenge me, that I have personal interest in, and where I can help someone else and see the impact I'm making on them ([[202502011226 Video - Fulfillment is achievable for anyone who tries]])
- Reading good books - 12wk year, psycho cybernetics
- Structuring my work and goals with 12-week year system
- Putting myself in environments and situations where there are more opportunities for social exchanges and comments.
What's not going well?
- Been losing to the temptations having my own room. I don't feel like I have control of it like I did last year when I was doing the Power Locking/Big Draw reps in KL and Phuket.
- Similarly time on my phone. At the end of the day and during meals, I feel like I don't have control of my discipline.
- Wanting more community, meeting more like-minded people, events, sports. Here in Porto and Istanbul it's felt like this just isn't the right place, that I need to wait until I get to Bali, Thailand, Da Nang, etc.
- Started getting more into looking at my YouTube analytics. How's the most recent video performing? Ah it's still only at 22 views, damn :( which is affecting my mental state negatively.
- I also started to get in my head about my content. Am I talking about things too broad? If I niche down I'll attract more target customers. But maybe I just talk about whatever and the people that resonate will stay?
- Getting in my head about doing touristy things. "What did you do in Istanbul?" "Oh I just worked..." "Oh, why?" The thing is, I don't feel like doing things, but I wonder if my future self will regret not doing things. I'm like, I can do boat cruises and tours when I'm older.
- Feeling like I don't have time to "relax" or do other things besides working on my laptop. What other hobbies do I have? Skiing, photography. What hobbies do I actually do?
- Right now I'm still in this phase of getting traction with everything. No one knows about me, so the limiting factor is me putting out content and doing reach outs. If I had a week of videos lined up, 6 shorts scheduled to post, and people using my software, I feel like I'd be more "ahead" like that feeling I had a couple weeks ago and could not feel guilty taking a break.
- The other thing is, I just don't know how else I'd spend my time that gives me a higher ROI than just making progress and feeling good about making progress. It's this combination of routine and habit, running from the insecurity of needing to make money and prove myself, and running towards just wanting to help people and feeling good about making progress towards goals.
- I kind of feel like I'm stuck in this in-between life. Look, I'm very grateful for it, but I wonder if I could or should be doing something differently.
- Grind: like I wrote above, I feel like I'm on this tipping point and getting it to tip requires my time right now.
- Travel/Balance: but then I also just live my life in all these cool places, Porto, Istanbul. I wonder if my future self would say why didn't you just take a day off and go explore or do something.
- And so I feel as though it's this flywheel that I'm building, this plane that's hurling down the runway. I just need a little bit more speed to get it going, to get the flywheel to start spinning on its own. Then once I'm in the air with the content systems, I can take my foot off the gas here and there. I'm not saying I just need a video to take off then I can pack my bags and stop working, but that idea that once I have a system working and pulling in people that's detached from my time, then I can finally detach myself from my time. You get me?
- And no, none of this has to do with happiness or "once I make $X or get X subscribers then I'll be happy." I don't think this has to do with happiness. I think it has to do more with pressure and/or stress (good and bad). Or more with detachment, relaxation, balance. It's the taking a Saturday to go on a date with a woman to explore the Batu Caves or go on a hike or get a surfing lesson.
- VideoHawk.co is not growing. But also again I haven't put it in front of that many people yet. Nobody knows I exist.
- I'm still having trouble valuing reading and learning other skills.
- What other skills would I actually like to learn: using AI, marketing, selling, validating quickly.
80/20:
- Guardrails - Not having guardrails in my life
- Staying in my own room -> temptations are too high.
- Not putting out enough videos -> I'm overemphasizing each video.
- Community - Not being in SE Asia and around people I know I resonate with. Not going to community and socializing events.
- Environment - Not putting myself in enough literal situations for social exchanges and comments.
What’s Next?
WE ARE SO BACK 🇲🇾🇲🇾🇲🇾
