The Week Of Pickleball, Introspection, And The Nomad Party

This Week:

Playing my first game of Pickleball this week!
Why I ended up going to this Nomad party.
Sharing some of my thoughts around this social exchange identity shift I’m working through.

April 2025

Su	M	T	W	Th	F	S
30	31	4/1	2	3	4	5
6	7	8	9	10	11	12
13	14	15	16	17	18	19
20	21	22	23	24	25	26
27	28	29	30	5/1	2	3

Where In The World Was I?

🇻🇳 Da Nang, Vietnam

Metrics From The Week

Business Update

Had my first call with a creator I delivered a report to!

Got another report request! And delivered!

And have been chatting with some people in DMs.

Went to a co-working space and recorded two videos! Got a double upload this week, one on YouTube strategy and one on a system for mental/limiting beliefs.

And would ya look at that, the YouTube API team finally reviewed my request that I submitted in early August 2024 😄. They gave me a couple ToS violations to fix. Fortunately most of the work I’ve done since then has been more backend stuff, so I basically just went in and removed some pages on the frontend, buttons, and badges.

It’s less critical now honestly since I’ve pivoted, but having more API quota will still indeed be useful so might as well.

And lastly, got a bunch of new outreach messages sent!

Da Nang Snaps

Social Events

Finally!

The co-working space I went to this week had some events every week (pickleball, beach day, lunch outing). I decided to just send it and go to the pickleball event.

It turned out to be super fun!

Never played pickleball before. I kinda had the expectation that it was a pretty chill and tame sport. That you just kind of stand there and hit it back and forth (cuz I’ve seen old people playing it 😂), but man I was yet again mistaken. VERY sweaty after 2 hours playing.

If Padel is “smaller tennis with walls,” Pickleball is like “smaller Padel with no walls.” Kind of like a whiffleball type of ball (not a tennis ball) and the court is smaller.

We went out to dinner after and they asked me if I was going to the Da Nang Nomad party on Saturday night. I was like, the who?

My initial reaction was: eh, I don’t like parties, they’re awkward, alcohol f-s up my sleep, I don’t know anyone, it’d be too uncomfortable. But then I thought, *rolls eyes* maybe “being uncomfortable” is the reason why I should actually go.

So I went 😂

Fortunately I met up with the people I met at Pickleball, we went to dinner first, got some drinks, then went to the party.

It was decent. I could spin this story as “yeah it was kind of what I expected, nothing special, see probably shouldn’t have gone,” but I could also just as well spin it as “it was different and uncomfortable, I danced a bit (mostly bobbed back and forth like everyone else did haha), and I also started TWO exchanges with 2 different people while I was waiting at the bar.”

I did lose my voice about 10 minutes after getting there by talking with these two guys though 😂

I’d say it was worth it. At the end of the day, I’m glad I went.

Thoughts From The Week

This week was a lot of ChatGPT’ing about some pretty deep identity and social stuff. I showed some of it in my video from Saturday (These ChatGPT prompts just exposed why I keep procrastinating)

That said, I think did a pretty good job of actually directing it and not just using it to continue to spin with analysis.

202503310841 Life is funny sometimes - women and social exchanges

...

## Social Exchanges
...

We get into talking about not needing more ideas and instead using less filtering. I bring up my win stacking system and starting social exchanges.

I'm in the middle of writing a response when this kid (maybe 4 years old?) sits down at the table next to me. (I'm at the corner table. There are 3 tables along the wall, he sits at the middle one)

Maybe 4 seconds pass by then he goes...

"HELLO!"

and I look over (he's looking at me) and I smile and go "hello! Good morning!"

He turns to the other guy at the 3rd table and goes

"HELLO!"

A second passes and he slowly turns to the kid, smiles, and says "hello"


Bruh. Like sometimes life just feels scripted, ya know?

(one of the exact reasons I filter out starting some exchanges/comments is because "I don't want to _interrupt_ someone")

I think this note is probably the best summary and representation of the reframe I’ve been going through:

202504031311 The new social reframe - to stop blocking what's already there

#personal #socialskills 

## Final Frame to Lock In:

> **“I’m not here to force connection. I’m here to stop blocking it.”**

That’s what this entire journey is about for you.  
Not _becoming_ someone else—just _removing the friction_ between what’s real and what’s expressed.

---

You want a 1-sentence anchor for moments like this?

Here you go:

> _**“I’m allowed to speak when something is real—and I’m strong enough to stay silent when it’s not.”**_

That’s the grounded man you’re becoming.  
You keep stacking _those_ moments?  
Women won’t just notice. They’ll lean in.

202503301202 🔥 Emotional Hook Bank - Struggle with edge

> What’s one internal tension I felt this week that others would relate to?

...

- 4/6/25 External state != Internal state. People have been shocked in the past that I seem socially insecure. I bet most people would've said that last night when I started TWO exchanges with people waiting for a drink at the bar, like, "what do you mean you struggle with social exchanges?" But just because it _looks_ like I don't have social insecurity and overthinking from the outside doesn't mean that my internal mental chatter reflects that. I think that's a big reason why I've wanted to share these thoughts online, to actually share the self-doubt and internal overthinking that goes on inside my head, to show that it's not always what it seems. So much of social media is showing the external. We see other people's results but we don't see the struggles they went through to get there.

But speaking of, I’ve been absolutely crushing my initiate social exchanges goals lately.

From my weekly note/win stacking system (if you watched How I’ve gamified my social skills goals (motivation hack))

- 3/31/25 iVegan. "You looking for an outlet?" to the guy looking around.
- 3/31/25 iVegan again, "gettin a workout in?" To the guy doing tricep dips on his chair.
- 3/31/25 "Where are you from?" To guy in Ocean glow hostel (Olof)
- 4/1/25 Asked couple if their smoothies were good and where they got them.
- 4/3/25 "Morning" to guy in the street who I made eye contact with.
- 4/4/25 "What's that drink?" to guy in Lu Coffee.
- 4/4/25 "is it too cold?" to 2 girls in dorm who turned down AC. Then followed up with "where you guys from?"
- 4/5/25 Nomad party 2x - both initiated exchange and asked for name

This content is not ready to be made public yet.

Food From The Week

Been absolutely spamming Adobo Mexican Grill with burrito bowls this week, such a good post-workout meal. It’s basically Chipotle (but better and cheaper 😂). Double chicken + guac + cheese for ~290k VND (~$11-$12, which is considered expensive here for one meal) but massive portion and great quality.